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Sick Day Double Hitter
Tuesday, May. 11, 2004, 11:23 p.m.

QUESTION: Why can't mom have her own sick day?

WHAT I LEARNED: Order the Peking Duck.

Well, Motherís Day is done. I had Peking Duck for dinner and presents too! It had been so long since I had seen my family together around a dinner table, versus a television set, that I had to pinch myself to make sure I wasnít dreaming. Of course, there were a few challenges Ė like for instance convincing the kids that they were actually capable of not annoying each other for approximately 1 hour while we ate our expensive restaurant meal so that it didnít taste like sand in mommyís and daddyís mouth. Anyone with kids know it is par for the course for brothers and sisters to bug each other Ė especially teenagers who have fine-tuned their skills at pushing their siblings buttons so that they can instantly drive one another berserk any time, any place.

Son referring to his sister who is about to walk out the door: Mom, donít let her go out again tonight.

Daughter referring to brother who is quietly sitting in his room: Mom, heís watching TV when he has homework to do.

I could go on but I wonít stuff your heads with tedious examples. Iím sure you get the idea.

Can I be the mom, please. Thatís all I ask. I want to be the one to decide who goes where for how long without comment from younger non-mobile siblings. I want to be the one to make the call on when the TV is about to overheat without a running commentary by big sister.

I know however, that this is hardly likely to happen. Instead, I will focus on my cool Momís Day gifts. First, there is a plug-in fountain with sound effects. The water drops down like rain with colored lights on it which is pretty spiffy if not particularly natural and I can add chimes, thunder, loons, rainforest noises, night sounds, or some new-age music that sounds a bit odd according to my son. Itís a sound and light show par excellance.

I also got a little web cam. It is as cute as a button and can fit in the palm of my hand. I am very excited that I got this modest little piece of new technology so that I can do some kind of web cam project. What kind of project? Well, I bought a fish on Motherís Day. Enough said. Stay tunedÖ

Monday, I was at the doctorís with my youngest. He had to have a chest x-ray to make sure he didnít have pneumonia. I worked all day from home but Iíll still get docked a day of sick leave because I had to call in sick. Juice boxes and tissues littered the coffee table and the floor by the sofa where my son parked himself. The house looked the worse for wear with shoes, schoolbooks, and one 5 lb dumbbell that I have already stubbed my toe on once today scattered carelessly about the floor. There are at least 10 pairs of shoes, 3 book bags, 2 handbags, and a sweatshirt by the front door. There are plenty of dishes in the sink and not one dishtowel left in the drawer. My husband told me I should have picked up toilet tissue at the store when I went to pick up the three prescriptions for my son. We had hot dogs, chip, and dip for dinner.

Back to business as usual.

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