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Suburban Island

Friday Five - If I Could
Saturday, Mar. 22, 2003, 12:19 a.m.

Question: Can I borrow a cup of Calgon?

What I Learned: There is no Enjoli in this house.

1. If you had the chance to meet someone you've never met, from the past or present, who would it be?
Id like to know my great-grandmothers as younger women. I think it would be fascinating to get a glimpse of their lives. One of the values of the diary is that it is a window to the everyday life that is so often lost over the course of time. This is true even in trying to remember the ins-and-outs of our own lives. So many times when I read an old diary entry, I find myself surprised by what I read oh yeah, I did think that, say that, feel that way. Also, because one day is stacked over the next and the next, all those interesting ordinary details of life just get forgotten as we press on in life. I have heard of people who have the diary of a grandparent to read. Unfortunately my great-grandmoms were just not the diary-writing types.

2. If you had to live in a different century, past or future, which would it be?
It would not be: During the Roman Empire too many lions, chariot races, and dissolute emperors, and then of course theres that whole Ides of March thing. It would not be during medieval times because Suburban Island in those days was probably an acre of dirt, serfdom, and a little bread and gruel. It would not be the Civil War period because my waist isnt small enough and it is likely I would embarrass myself if I had to wear a hoop skirt. The Puritan era also seems like a bad fit for me.

I can see myself in three places: In the future because I could have an electronic house that cleaned itself and treated me like a queen to boot my current model is self-disordering and totally ignores me. In the middle ages after all because maybe Id luck out and get to live in a castle and hang out with a guy who knows how to wear body armor, calls me milady, and always looks like a LOTR hero. In the 1940s because they had the music right, knew what romance was, and rode out the tough times.

3. If you had to move anywhere else on Earth, where would it be?
An island of course! One with palm trees, beach with rolling surf, a light breeze blowing, perfect sunsets, more sunshine than rain, a big hammock, and a recipe book for exotic cocktails and no-fuss dinners, and lots of stars in the nighttime sky. Throw in a few books and some electronics I need my computer after all. Perfection.

4. If you had to be a fictional character, who would it be?
First, here is who it would not be. Madame Bovary sometimes you just need to straighten up and fly right. Joan of Arc sword-wielding action and getting burnt at the stake is just too high stress for me.

I could see the Maid Marion thing its got just the right mix of adventure, romance, and the legendary. Some people might say she was the real deal and she might be but there is a lot of glorious fiction wrapped around her persona at this point. A scrappy heroine in a Georgette Heyer Regency Romance would be an option. Its fun to be audacious and still wind up with the guy and fancy living too. Finally, how about that lady in the old commercial who could cook stuff in a pan, please her man, take care of the whole family, and kick butt at work just because she wore Enjoli perfume? Id like to find out how she does that. And you know that Calgon-take-me-away chick? I think that could work for me too.

5. If you had to live with having someone else's face as your own for the rest of your life, whose would it be?
Im attached to my face for all its flaws so I think Ill just stick with it.

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